r/TwoXChromosomes Jan 14 '22

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u/Shufflepants Jan 14 '22

"he grabbed my phone"

This. This little thing right here is enough for us to know that he is not a "good guy".

and started choking me and put his foot on my neck. That's when it hit me that I could die.

That is how you should be feeling at that moment. Because this is not just behavior to indicate he's not a "good guy". This is the behavior of an abusive murderer.

Not on purpose bc i really do feel he is a good guy

Not on purpose? Of course it was on purpose. He didn't slip on a banana peel and accidentally fall and have his foot land on your neck. He assaulted you. He attacked you. And threatened your life. Something like this couldn't be any more "on purpose" unless he wrote you a letter beforehand detailing exactly what he was going to do before hand. But from the sounds of it, this is not the first time he's don't something like this. And so, those earlier times he did something were explicit messages that he was going to do something like this again.

They ended up taking him away in handcuffs. Its been a few hours now and I can't help but blame myself.

Blame? You should be glad this motherfucker has been taken away in handcuffs. You should hope that you never see this asshole again; that he goes to jail for as long as possible.

Idk what to do.

What you should be doing is making sure you have somewhere safe to live that he doesn't have access to. If you can, move in with some one else that you know and trust and who recognizes what an abusive asshole (what should now be) your ex is. And then when you are able to move into your own place, keep your address as secret as possible. Be sure that everyone you know who knows where you live knows not to give anyone your address. And you should probably also be filing for a restraining order against him so that after he's out of jail he can't be near you. What you shouldn't do is ever talk to or see that dude in person ever again for any reason except possibly to testify at his trial to get him thrown in prison.