r/interestingasfuck 12d ago Silver 27 Helpful 41 Wholesome 27 hehehehe 1 LOVE! 1

How Germans buy sliced bread /r/ALL

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64.4k Upvotes

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u/Sidehussle 12d ago

My Oma has a bread slicer in her drawer, so we get to adjust how thick we want each slice. 😁

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u/mintgoody03 12d ago

Mine too! Does every Oma have that? Lol

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u/Gylfie123 12d ago

I think it is mandatory for every oma to have one!

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u/hjholtz 12d ago

This machine has three buttons for thick, medium, and thin slices.

Granted, when slicing at home (regardless of whether you're using a machine or a knife), you have even finer control, and can even cut slices of varying thickness from the same loaf.

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u/Dradray 12d ago edited 12d ago Silver Gold Helpful Wholesome

If this machine was located inside a Walmart it would be a bloody massacre.

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u/toeofcamell 12d ago

The poor workers would have to fish keys out, paper clips, sticks, loose change, and many other things, it would be broken down more than it was working

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u/uDontInterestMe 12d ago Helpful

Dirty diapers would def be in there. Signature Wal-Mart item. 🤢

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u/monkey_trumpets 12d ago

And gnawed chicken bones

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u/AGENT0321 12d ago Silver

Gnawed dirty diapers

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u/majidjaxn 12d ago

Lmao I'm trying to use the bathroom quietly while my family is asleep man

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u/Zaritan77 12d ago

I heard someone say something about Diapers, maybe this thread is trying to help you.

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u/tracythecat 12d ago

There's a chicken bone stuck in my ass sideways

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u/Zaritan77 12d ago

Would you describe that as a pleasant or unpleasant event in your life right now?

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u/DormantGolem 12d ago

New parents will think this is a baby changing area.

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u/Outrageous_Dude1826 12d ago

Half chewed condoms

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u/heathmon1856 12d ago

And a newborn child

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u/Ornery-Ad9694 12d ago

Most of it anyway

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u/Randomguy3421 12d ago

To shreds, you say.

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u/stephie8204 12d ago

Someone would try to pee in it, or discard their feces in it, which is another signature Walmart item

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u/Crouch310 12d ago

Haha WTF, you guys need to get your shit together.

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u/stephie8204 12d ago

I used to work at Walmart, and people are that nasty. I had to remove dirty diapers from shelves, clean the floors because someone had diarrhea and didn't want to use the bathroom. I had to remove and replace fresh vegetables because someone peed in the display, ect.

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u/Secretsthegod 12d ago Gold All-Seeing Upvote Rocket Like

behaviour like that would be unthinkable over here. you guys seem to have a nation wide mental health problem

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u/lRhanonl 12d ago

There are psychological studies that show just that.

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u/PTSDaway 12d ago Silver

We've also seen how you vote.

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u/Archer007 12d ago

Anyone can be President [threatening]

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u/temporaryuser1000 12d ago

It's American individualism run amok. Basically the idea that you are free to do whatever you want, then mix that with drugs and mental health issues.

Americans can say what they want about social democracy european-style, but at least it imposes some societal boundaries on individualism.

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u/lesser_panjandrum 12d ago

I think Art. 26 of the Grundgesetz forbids giving burns of this magnitude.

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u/Apprehensive_Paint90 12d ago

GODDD BLESS AMERICAAA LAND OF THE FREE 🎶

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u/WingedLing 12d ago Wholesome

WHAT THE FUCK YOU SAY ILL FUCKING FUCK YOU UP THIS IS THE GREATEST COUNTRY IN THE FUCKING WORLD

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u/The_Neon_Ninja 12d ago

/s maybe? It's hard to tell because we actually have mericans like this.

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u/otfromtheoc 12d ago

I can’t believe this actually happens in real life. Here in NZ this would make prime time news

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u/gelinrefira 12d ago

I lived in Singapore now. I think that will trigger national level self-reflection.

Might see op-ed in newspaper here lamenting "what happened to our society!"

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u/_triks 12d ago edited 12d ago

For real, we don't put up with that silly shit – you'd be ousted and making a national apology faster than a dildo hitting an MP's face on Newshub...

But seriously, I once went to America and had the weirdest experience the first time I ever stepped foot in a Walmart – this old dude in a long trench coat was getting escorted out by the security screaming all types of nonsensical jibberish. I had only just made it about ten meters through the front doors as they pulled him past me, so naturally, I pull out the popcorn.

Just before they toss him out, he suddenly breaks free, rips off his coat, then runs fully naked around the front of the store yelling at the top of his lungs like an absolute madman. The Security guards caught him again quickly and dragged him along the floor back to the entrance where the cops were waiting to meet with him.

As a Kiwi, I thought all that crazy stuff you hear about Walmart being a nuthouse was just over-exaggerated dross. Boy, was I wrong.

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u/kennethtrr 12d ago

We can’t put them anywhere because that would cost money, and we have established that spending money = communism….

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u/Carche69 12d ago

Except when it comes to spending money on THE most communist-like institution we have in the US—the military. How’s that for irony?

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u/Malue 12d ago

Absolutely, did the rampant school shootings not give it away?

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u/robotevil 12d ago

We also literally voted in a reality TV star to president. President of the whole freaking country.

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u/ran_to_the_ftl 12d ago

Yeah, a lot of friends and family work in retail and i‘ve heard a lot of stories about rude or annoying costumers but never anything involving pee or feces. Disgusting. WTF

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u/Boomboooom 12d ago

I’ve had to clean shit from the walls once working in an American grocery….

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u/ran_to_the_ftl 12d ago

Living in Europe, I cant even fathom that. What kind of people do this shit? Is it drug addicts? Homeless people? Mentally ill people?

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u/Eymanney 12d ago 'MURICA

As a german who works in a company with one major department in the detroit area and who has been around lake Michigan for the past 10 years, I do not consider the USA as a first world country. The poverty, sick people and latent danger I experienced there is worse than anything I have seen in my life so far and I have been all around the former Soviet countries in eastern Europe.

It was really eye opening to me how far away the USA are culturally from Europe when I went there the first time.

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u/CanNotBeTrustedAtAll 12d ago

Yeah, but not only is healthcare shit over here, but even if you are on a plan, psychological services aren't often covered.

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u/Secretsthegod 12d ago

honestly i feel sorry for americans over that one basic fact. affordable health care would solve tons of systemic problems in the long run

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u/CanNotBeTrustedAtAll 12d ago

Much like in capitalism, anything beyond a fiscal year or two is someone else's problem.

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u/Centralredditfan 12d ago

Didn't the politics give it away. They're on another level of nastyness.

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u/creative_toe 12d ago

WTF? How is this normal behavior? The worst thing you see here (Austria), is when someone takes meat out of the fridge and then put it somewhere else when they decide they don't want it. THAT is antisocial behavior, since then the workers have to throw it away. Buuuut, what you describe... I have a really hard time believing it. How... nah. I don't have words for this.

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u/rey_lumen 12d ago

They get their shit together in Walmart. Literally.

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u/anewlo 12d ago

So when we say that corporations need to improve, not place the burden on consumers, actually when it comes to Walmart, it IS a little on the consumers after all?

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u/asportate 12d ago

Why are all Walmarts the same . Like they all attract the same kinda shitty people no matter where they are.

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u/Sangxero 12d ago

Because cheap. Cheap attracts every type, but this type has a fetish with cheap in particular.

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u/SarcasticAssClown 12d ago

These machines are only in Lidl and Aldi though, so cheap. And certainly also attracting not only but also a certain clientele.

Then again, they may not be the lowest rung of the ladder in that regard - Penny and Netto serm to attract even stranger folks.

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u/alterexego 12d ago

"Ghetto Netto", as it's called, my American friends.. still better than Walmart. Nobody pees on the avocadoes, which are actually pretty good

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u/robi112358 12d ago

And Penner Penny

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u/TragedyPornFamilyVid 12d ago

They really aren't.

In my general area there's 3 categories. There are the rural walmarts that carry everything from firearms to fresh fish. They used to sell live livestock but haven't done that in a while. At least not inside the store. They don't discourage it in the parkimg lot.

There is the scary walmart in the downtown city where there has been large amounts of blood on the floor both times I've been. Someone was either stabbed or spontaneously lost a pint or two. They do not sell firearms or ammo and keep their knives all locked behind the counter. We warn people about this one.

Then there are the nice walmarts. They're about half the size of the other walmarts, have slightly fresher produce and frozen food than Target, bake whole grain braided things and use a green/blue color scheme instead of the blue/white.

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u/Andysm16 12d ago

And tried-on underwear from the lingerie department.🤮

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u/acrowsmurder 12d ago Silver

You know someone's sticking a Nerf football in there

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u/Verona_Pixie 12d ago

I wouldn't do it. .... but I would kind of like to see a Nerf football sliced up in that thing. I'm ngl.

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u/CiDirkona 12d ago All-Seeing Upvote

It's the greatest thing since sliced stray cats!

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u/thymeraser 12d ago

Probably find a missing finger, or two, too

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u/amhotw 12d ago

You are forgetting the toes.

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u/Believe_to_believe 12d ago

Our local Kroger has a bread slicer now. Haven't used it yet, but it looks cool.

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u/boot20 12d ago

They're pretty common in my neck of the woods too.

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u/zuzg 12d ago

That's a Lidl, afaik you guys also have Lidls over there. Worth checking out

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u/Believe_to_believe 12d ago

Closest one to me is 604 miles away. That's a long trip for bread slicing.

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u/SoftBellyButton 12d ago

Worth it, believe him.

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u/sunshinekraken 12d ago Wholesome

We have one in our Kroger and it was fun as hell to use…god I’m lame 😒

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u/dingman58 12d ago Silver Helpful Wholesome

You're not lame. You find joy in simple things. That's a wonderful trait

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u/sunshinekraken 12d ago

Oh wow thanks, what a nice thing to say!

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u/-lilgunna- 12d ago

username checks out :)

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u/Ta2whitey 12d ago

Where is the kraken part?

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u/chookity_juice 12d ago

A polite person? On Reddit?! Impossible!

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u/Freeman7-13 12d ago

Everyone can go ahead and enjoy their expensive hobbies while I'm over here enjoying this free bread service.

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u/mdflmn 12d ago

Who put the baby in the bread slicer?

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u/scalectrix 12d ago

Nobody puts Baby in the bread slicer.

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u/wickbrand 12d ago

Good thing they are only at Whole Foods. Where all the “civilized” people shop.

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u/PabloAlaska6 12d ago

Lol my drug dealer used to swear by whole foods.. great guy!

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u/bonydogfarts 12d ago

I think you meant your pharmaceutical technician providing private concierge service.

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u/Coygon 12d ago

I swear by Whole Foods, too. And I especially swear in Whole Foods, when I see the prices.

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u/BrianG1410 12d ago

Honestly kind of my first thought. Mine was some idiots would find a way to cut some digits off or worse and then bam! Instant lawsuit lol

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u/Ecmomlae 12d ago

They have them in all the Lidi all over the world, no lawsuits yet, and as soon as you open the door the blade stops

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u/GERIKO_STORMHEART 12d ago

Ya the Lidl supermarkets here in Ireland do the same. 3 different thicknesses too but I can slice it at home easy enough so fuck it. Plus... its best to keep the loaf whole until you actually want to use it.

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u/CannabisGardener 12d ago

Same in France. I just assumed all Lidls do this.

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u/RedditFanLady 12d ago Wholesome

Same in Hungary.

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u/boerboris 12d ago

Netherlands too

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u/bustab 12d ago

Czech Republic Lidl signing in

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u/Hashbrownmidget 12d ago

USA lidl checking in surprisingly

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u/CrazyGaming312 12d ago

Slovak Lidl checking in too.

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u/kicked-in-the-gonads 12d ago

Portugal enters the chat.

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u/pixeled007 12d ago

Spanish Lidls also have this machine, although no one uses it

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u/ShiShor 12d ago

Romanian lidl has it too

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u/alfgoto 12d ago Helpful

France too 🙋‍♂️

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u/DroneDashed 12d ago

Portugal too!

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u/miniuc100 12d ago

Same in Poland!

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u/Nzgrim 12d ago

And Slovakia.

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u/themightyduck04 12d ago

Greece as well!

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u/vikihey 12d ago

I use it every week in Mercadona

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u/rubens10000 12d ago

my mother does lol, she's so happy about it

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u/Psydator 12d ago

I'm German, but many countries I've been to have this. Idk why op thinks this is a German thing.

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u/N1biru 12d ago

Well, Lidl is a German Supermarket that just expanded to other countries... So if most people only know this from a Lidl (or Aldi) it could still be a German thing.

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u/elpadremg 12d ago

this is basically a NA vs EU thing i suppose.

all the upvotes coming from folks from NA thinking how advanced EU's technology is.

and all the comments are from confused EU folks, who are wondering why this post is upvoted so often.

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u/nspavle 12d ago

Yeah it’s the same wherever Lidl is

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u/Delicious_Bet_6336 12d ago Silver

That’s the best thing since sliced bread

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u/Think_Sympathy_5565 12d ago

These exist in America too. Mostly in Whole Foods but I’ve seen them elsewhere.

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u/AxelShoes 12d ago

Honest question, does freshly sliced bread taste much different than pre-sliced?

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u/Strifethor 12d ago edited 12d ago

Bread that is not pre sliced avoids either preservatives or early oxidation. It stays nice and moist until the time it’s cut and up until about 2 days after

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u/LeonidasSpacemanMD 12d ago

Yea, I was just thinking this is nice if you’re going to use a lot of this bread today. But I prefer to cut as I use the bread so it takes longer to get stale in the middle. Maybe it’s just in my head but I feel like the ends get a bit stale but the rest stays ok, if you slice it this way it all gets stale at the same pace

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u/NotsoNewtoGermany 12d ago

I must explain, German bread is amazing. There are over 3000 different local loafs, and every bakery knows how to make all of them. Every single time I come back from Germany, as I live in NL, even from the supermarket, the bread is so freshly baked and fantastic, that I can't help but go through the loaf in 2 days. Egg toast with mustard for breakfast, chicken sandwiches for lunch and soup for dinner, belle I even know it 2+4+4, 10 slices of it is gone.

Seriously good stuff.

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u/LeonidasSpacemanMD 12d ago

You’ve singlehandedly convinced me I must travel to Germany

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u/Monsi_ggnore 12d ago

Contrary to popular belief the foodstuff Germans care most about isn't beer, it's bread. Ask any German who comes back from a long, great vacation how it was, the answer is always the same: "it was fantastic, but the bread... :( ".

There are nations that consume more, and depending on who you ask also produce better beer, but no one comes even remotely close to Germans when it comes to making and consuming bread. The German word for dinner is literally "evening bread" (Abendbrot).

If bread is your thing then a visit may be worth it indeed.

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u/NaCl_Sailor 12d ago

we do call beer liquid bread though

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u/NotsoNewtoGermany 12d ago

It's also cheeeeeeaaap. I feel like I live life on a cheat code whenever I but bread in Germany. A $13 rustic artisan loaf in the states costs €2.75 in Germany. There are bakeries in every street, it's guild protected to, so to own your own bakery you need to be a master Baker, which means rising through the ranks of apprenticeship. Pun intended.

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u/danabrey 12d ago

Loaves of bread can cost THIRTEEN DOLLARS?

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u/Internal_Rock 12d ago

Your bread consumption is wild lol. 2+4+4 so 4 slices of bread with soup? Love it unless you meant you +partner in which that’s def understandable.

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u/NotsoNewtoGermany 12d ago

Not including my partner. The British have a phrase— Moreish, which means something that's so good and delicious you can't want have more of it.

Once you have a bowl of soup with two pieces for dipping, you think... I'll have an extra bowl of soup and two more slices for dipping!

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u/Sarcophilus 12d ago

Am German, can confirm. Even our super market bakeries have like 6-8 different styles of bread baked fresh in store.

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u/Paceeed 12d ago

Just know that there are also Germans that can't wait to visit the Netherlands again, partial because of your bread (It's me, I am that guy). It's just so damn fluffy.

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u/NotsoNewtoGermany 12d ago

Visit for the Vlai!

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u/Lalidie1 12d ago

I used to come for the frikandels but they became accessible in Germany, too

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u/sandnose 12d ago

In large parts of Europe bread is a huge part of the culture. Being norwegian I'd say it's what I continuously eat the most of in any given week. But then I also like it to be as whole-grainy as possible with a soft core and a crispy crust, which you only get if it's as fresh as possible.

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u/democraticcrazy 12d ago

german here, part of our culture as well. Most Many people eat bread twice a day, and our word for the evening meal is Abendbrot, literally 'evening bread'. My buddy married an american woman, and she complained at some point "can we eat something else please?" - up until then it didn't even occur to either of us that we eat bread that much.

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u/The_R4ke 12d ago

Bread that's been sliced will dry out faster. If you're going to use all that bread in a day or really need precise slices for something it's good to get it sliced, othewise it's best to cut off what you need when you need it for the most freshness.

This is also a particularly complex slicer. The bakery I go to uses a much simpler one that's just several sharp blades in a fixed location that slice the loaf. It probably doesn't cut it as cleanly as this does and is only one size, but I also imagine it's less likely to fail and easier to fix if it does.

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u/phillysteakcheese 12d ago

Lies! This could only exist in Germany, because OP said so! /s

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u/KnoeYours3lpH 12d ago

And ALL the Germans use them!

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u/DowNeedles 12d ago

We also have that in France and I believe it's a Lidl so we definitely have these in the east at least

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u/MrBombus 12d ago

Yep that's Lidl.

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u/Rreknhojekul 12d ago

We have these in Ireland too.

Yes, it’s a German store but…

I lived in Germany for the best part of 2 years. I mostly shopped at REWE, Tegut, Penny and Bio. Occasionally I would visit other supermarkets such as Edeka and maybe occasionally a Lidl.

None of the stores I regularly frequented had a bread cutting set up like this.

I can fairly confidently say, it’s not a German thing, it’s a Lidl thing. (A newer built Lidl store thing)

Lidl just happens to be German.

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u/Vayne-YasuoAbuser14 12d ago

Nah, many edekas have them now, at least the more central ones

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u/cinallon 12d ago

Aldi, REWE, Lidl and Edeka in my area have them as well, my local bakery also. I live in Hannover, Mid-north of Germany.

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u/Itchy58 12d ago

German here: Other Supermarkts like Aldi Süd, Kaufland, Rewe or Netto have them as well, but not every single has one (same for Lidl)

I guess it depends more on the size of the individual supermarket.

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u/Gilldot 12d ago

They're in supervalu and were originally in the old superquinns too.

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u/Chaiwalla2 12d ago

I would scoop up those crumbs as well. They are tasty.

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u/phillysteakcheese 12d ago Silver Helpful Wholesome

You're a tasty crumb.

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u/Triette 12d ago

Awww

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u/toeofcamell 12d ago

You guys are too much I’m leaven

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u/LurkerPatrol 12d ago

Bread 👍🏽

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u/lythox_ 12d ago

Bread 👍

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u/toeofcamell 12d ago

I wish I could comment between you so I could be inbred

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u/HerezahTip 12d ago

Bread 👍🏻

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u/toeofcamell 12d ago

Thanks sexy, I mean mom!

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u/Triette 12d ago edited 12d ago

No doughn’t go breaking my heart.

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u/alexandraentendre 12d ago

Found the raccoon.

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u/LurchNasti420 12d ago

They have this in America. Wegmans best grocery store IMO

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u/cyrenns 12d ago

Bro I miss wegmans so much. I moved to Florida from NJ and Publix just ain’t doing it for me.

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u/plasmac9 12d ago

They pay their employees well and treat them well too. A rarity for sure.

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u/womaninthekitcjen 12d ago

Wait I thought this is how it was done everywhere.

You can still buy already sliced bread tho

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u/BiggerBadgers 12d ago

At my work (Australia) the bakers in the bakery have basically the same machine but they do it for you

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u/chaxuk 12d ago

Can you imagine the carnage if we had these in Coles? There would be daily occurence of some twit sticking an inappropriate object in it.

  • four pack of bonds undies
  • bottle of V8 juice
  • packet of tim tams
  • a whole rainbow cake
  • half a cabbage

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u/BortAndErny 12d ago

I've come across one of these in a coles actually, was just recently installed for everyone to use. No ones managed to jam it up so far, but time will tell.

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u/Cryptic911 12d ago

Same here, supermarkts however allow you to dot it yourself if you want. You can actually select three different thickness of the slides too.

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u/Pera_Espinosa 12d ago

It's a bread slicer. What's interesting or uniquely German about this? This doesn't seem to be either.

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u/sleepydalek 12d ago

If you can find a shop where they sell fresh bread in the US, the slicer is usually a machine with blades that cut through the loaf all at once.

The video here looks like it was shot in Lidl.

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u/Notchle 12d ago

Most modern machines here un fermany also cut it all at once

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u/Mapale 12d ago

As a german I can confirm that this is in fact a LIDL.
Source: The 38124 LIDL Stores within 5 KM from my place all look like this

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u/caffeinatedelirium 12d ago Wholesome

Only a penitent man will pass.

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u/Thereminz 12d ago

penitent man.... penitent man.... KNEEL!!

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u/bizzy_bone 12d ago

god damn, fantastic. you have posted... wisely.

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u/ichoosetosavemyself 12d ago

Stupid personal injury attorneys...always keeping us from having good things in America.

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u/kingsoftboy 12d ago

There's a bread slicer like that at my local Kroger equivalent (not that I'm going there lately) in the flyover midwest, fwiw

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u/tensents 12d ago

Does it start with an 'M'?

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u/toeofcamell 12d ago

Yes Machine starts with an M

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u/baalroo 12d ago

These are in like 90% of the grocery stores in my city here in the US.

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u/WaldenFont 12d ago

My Whole Foods store has a bread slicer.

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u/APe28Comococo 12d ago

More like stupid Americans that would figure out how to override the safety measures because they want their bread cut thicker or thinner.

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u/Not-Oliver 12d ago

Stupid Americans and their

spinning wheel

Overriding of bread cutting machine safety measures for preference of bread slices.

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u/Think_Sympathy_5565 12d ago

You guys must not have Whole Foods near you…

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u/jimmyn0thumbs 12d ago Silver Wholesome

If they wanted whole foods they wouldn't be cutting the bread

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u/AnalArtiste 12d ago

For some reason i hate this joke but simultaneously feel that it deserves my upvote

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u/GooseandMaverick 12d ago

I'm morbidly curious about your personal art collection butt at the same time I hope you don't have a link.

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u/FunBrians 12d ago

That was so awfully good

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u/infatuatedknight 12d ago

Fuckn beautiful

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u/MoistDitto 12d ago

Angry upvote

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u/piedude67 12d ago

Thank you for that

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u/FBI_Open_Up_Now 12d ago

Krogers, IGA, Remke all have one of these by me.

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u/tensents 12d ago

And many other grocery stores.

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u/Imaybeerong 12d ago

Ah put my hand in because I saw the face of jesus in one of those slices and the devil done cast me down amen

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u/ScottRoberts79 12d ago

There are buttons for that.....

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u/ianishomer 12d ago

Why is this unusual?

These machines are everywhere in European supermarkets

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u/wickbrand 12d ago

They are in the US and Canada too. Not sure why so many people are amazed. Maybe they’ve never noticed it before? 😁

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u/theoryofjustice 12d ago

It would be even better if she would use the provided gloves.

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u/rickeyLV 12d ago

Bread slicing technology is only available in Germany.

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u/pizzatimein24h 12d ago

I am from Germany, but I've never seen anyone actually use this machine😅

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u/abzinth91 12d ago Wholesome

At Kaufland there are mostly used from my experience.. but the hygiene of the customers is.. questionable at best.

I like to go to the bakery instead

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u/catcint0s 12d ago

This more of an ALDI/LIDL thing, we have the same in Hungary.

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u/wickbrand 12d ago

They have these at Whole Foods here in the US, and it’s the same. Never seen it used once. 😁

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u/BeBamboocha 12d ago

Usually the modern machines already cut it all at once :P How do they do it in other countries?

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u/rendezvousnz 12d ago

Yeah, Bakers Delight in NZ cut their bread for you, the machine has multiple blades and all slices are cut at once.

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u/brihamedit 12d ago

Hands touched many parts of the set up. :S

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u/ambrofelipe 12d ago

Lidl has disposable plastic gloves next to where you take the bag that the lady is using to pack the bread. She just didn’t take a glove.

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u/Fruney21 12d ago

That’s the best thing since this thing

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u/MaesterOfPanic 12d ago

The would be such a shitshow in the US.

A decade working customer service at a grocery store has shown me that this is why we, as Americans, can't have nice things.

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u/Chetsteadm3n 12d ago

Just what I want to take my fresh bread and stick where a bunch of peoples filthy hands have been touching.

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u/TableWallFurnace 12d ago

Yeah that's all I could think about. Not even any tongs to use to handle the bread!

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u/flipflop41 12d ago

You are supposed to wear disposable gloves in the bread section

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u/biznatch11 12d ago

That's probably why the slicer at my local store has been unavailable since covid started.

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