r/youseeingthisshit Oct 06 '22

Let me see if I can get his attention Human

29.6k Upvotes

u/YouSeeingThisBot Oct 24 '22

Upvote this comment if this is a proper "You seeing this shit?" reaction. Downvote this comment if this is not fit for this subreddit.

3.9k

u/rubixd Oct 06 '22

This is me in my early 20s — no idea what the fuck to do in a situation like this.

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u/NeedToLearnToListen Oct 06 '22 Silver

This reminds me of my dumb ass in my early 20's. A girl was flirting with me for almost a month. She ended up inviting me to her house to work on a project that she offered to help me with. She chose a conviennent time to invite me home, since her 2 roommates were not home and would'nt be before late evening. She was wearing light clothes compared to the weather and was a bit touchy and flirty. What did my dumb ass do ? I offered to go to a coffee place near to work on the project. She had to change her clothes while I waited in the living room. Did I mention that she did that while her door stayed open ? We finished the project at the coffee place. She offered to grab lunch together at her house so I thanked her and went home to feast alone on one day old cold pizza.

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u/cursedspinach Oct 06 '22 Silver Table Slap

If it makes you feel better, I once met a girl at a party who was from out of town and she kept dropping hints like “I’m not sure where I’m gonna stay tonight” and I told her she could sleep on my floor because I just vacuumed

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u/BulbusDumbledork Oct 06 '22

your dress looks great! it would look even better on my floor...

when you use it as a pillow! i just vacuumed this bitch it's hella comfy down there, see you in the morning

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u/baby_contra Oct 07 '22

Army Niko: ahhh this dirt HELLA comfy!

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u/Castieled Oct 06 '22

Went to a party once where a girl was hardcore hitting on me, I was flirting back but figured I’d get her number and take her out sometime. About an hour later we’re sitting on the couch and she straight up says, “So are you gonna take me back to your place and fuck me or do I need to spell it out for you?” We left immediately. Sometimes you really have to just lay it out for us.

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u/Mahglazzies Oct 07 '22

I had a situation similar to this when I was 16. I was a virgin, very insecure. Nobody had ever shown any interest in me, except a girl I worked with in my shitty retail job at the time. WAY out of my league. Impossibly so. She would flirt non-stop and find any excuse she could to touch me. My arm, shoulder, neck, back. Any opportunity. She would invite me out to her car during lunch breaks to eat lunch with her, I'd always politely refuse. In the break room, when I was walking behind her to get to the microwave, she actually BUTT-CHECKED me in to the lockers and brushed it off as being playful and joking. That was a weird one. I had no idea at the time that any of this was indicative of her being interested in me, by the way.

One day during lunch break, she invited me to her car again and I refused. She exhaled, obviously frustrated, grabbed my hand and said "listen, I don't know how I can make this any more obvious for you, but if you come with me right now, we're going to go to my car and I'm going to suck your dick." This is where our story differs.

I was VERY taken off guard. I got shy, flustered, said no and regret it to this day! ¯_(ツ)_/¯

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u/Icy-Engineering4397 Oct 07 '22

Wtf?!🤯

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u/Mahglazzies Oct 07 '22

I KNOW! I was totally in to her, too. After turning her down like that, in the most clumsy and awkward fashion imaginable, I could never recover. Basically lost all interest in me and I don't blame her, haha.

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u/Bonfalk79 Oct 07 '22

This moment will haunt your dreams (and showers) for eternity. RIP my brother in awkward youth.

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u/Mahglazzies Oct 07 '22

It will. I'm 32 now, that was a lifetime ago and I still think back to it. RIP indeed, brother.

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u/Michael_Cookie5 Oct 07 '22

I’m amazed you turned her down when she asked to spend time with you

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u/hateexchange Oct 06 '22

Lucky bastard.

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u/BustinArant Oct 06 '22

I always knew it was real..

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u/FLOHTX Oct 06 '22

So did you take her back to your place to fucking dominate her at Mario Kart?

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u/MilkyVillager Oct 06 '22

HA! This is so relevant. I had a crush on a girl and met her at a party where the guy she liked was playing a show. My idiot ass tried to find a way to ask her back to mine, so I told her she should come over and we could play some Mario Kart. After the singer guy shot her down, she texted me and said, "So, Mario Kart, huh?"

54

u/RosenButtons Oct 07 '22

I love Mario Kart! I would have come over immediately, and then been shocked when you put the moves on. Girls are dumb too!

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u/Indoorlogsled Oct 07 '22

So. Many. Stories. 🤦🏽‍♀️

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u/CapybaraSteve Oct 07 '22

yeahhhh… i told my now-bf that the dog i was sitting was mad at me bc i kept kissing him and he said “that’s dumb, why would anyone not want to be kissed by you” and i was like ah yes that’s just friendly things friends do

a week after that, when i finally caught on to the fact that he was flirting with me, we were talking and he asked me what my “type” is so i described it and went “yeah i always feel hella called out when i catch feelings bc they always exactly match my type. first there was this guy, then that one, and now you!” and he went “ME?!?!” lmao

we’re both dumb, it took us a week or two after that to start dating

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u/HemiBaby Oct 07 '22

It's true, its how I met my now husband. I literally told him I sleep naked

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u/[deleted] Oct 06 '22

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u/Makaisaurus Oct 07 '22

He was a boy

She was a girl

Can I make it any more obvious?

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u/andyrocks Oct 06 '22 edited Oct 07 '22

how much more obvious could I be?"

Well you could have fucking said something, that would have been much more obvious

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u/Ison-J Oct 06 '22

I mean what the other option say. Hey you can stay at my place and leave the chance that they take it as a creepy advance

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u/rochakgupta Oct 06 '22

Lmao what a chad

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u/39128038018230 Oct 06 '22

lmfao bro chose to say floor out of all the words he couldve said, not even couch god damn

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u/Tandril91 Oct 06 '22

But what if the couch wasn’t vacuumed?

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u/pangea_person Oct 06 '22 edited Oct 06 '22

Dude. Welcome to the ever growing club of self realization. One good thing now looking back at those missed opportunities, I realize that I'm actually a decent catch, even back then.

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u/acrizz Oct 06 '22

I am not incredibly attractive, but I am not bad looking. The number of times women have told me (10 years later) that they had a big crush on me during high school astounds me. My low self esteem really made me lose so many opportunities.

24

u/calcium Oct 07 '22

If you're anything like me you needed to have a 2x4 swatted over your head to get a clue, else you look like a pervert. Hell, in my 20's after a night out with a girl she kept asking me back to her house for coffee at 2am. I instead dropped her off and told her I didn't like coffee and that I'd see her another day. Drove home, went to bed and laying in bed I was like "Oh..... fuck." All good, we smashed later, but not one of my more defining moments.

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u/chill633 Oct 07 '22

George, is that you? (What you described is a Seinfeld episode.)

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u/jeffersonairmattress Oct 06 '22

It can be a blessing- I failed to read the signals of a longtime friend when she invited herself over for a movie and a bottle of wine, took off her top and wrapped my arms around her as I very carefully avoided touching any part of her bra. I am an idiot. We just watched the movie. She asked me for my friend's number when she left and wound up with him the next night, then proceeded to destroy several other relationships due to her screaming hotness, weak-willed dudes and total lack of principles. I regret everything. But I'm also thankful to have escaped what would have been a drama-filled relationship that likely would have led to my doom. I still see her around and she talks through my suddenly-invisible wife like the vain creature she always has been; my wife likes how I work her name into any responses no matter how far back into exclusive "the old days" references weirdo tries to twist things.

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u/Shermander Oct 06 '22

One of my buddies I made from the Air Force was a bit of this. When he was in highschool he played football, ran cross country/track and was part of the "1000" lbs club that the school would annotate in their weightroom.

Imagine total babe magnet type. Except this dude's got a bad case of acne, nasty ass chin dust left and right, can't really grow nice facial hair, and dudes got long greasy hair that went past his shoulders.

Just your total run of the mill nerdy looking, athletic jock.

He enlists into the Air Force. They cut his greasy asd hair. Acne somewhat clears up, nothing acutane won't clear. Clean shaven to show off the sharp jawline.

10/10 stud, no homo.

I once walked in on this dude under the covers with two total dimes at his party. He was virgin didn't know what to do. Don't think the chicks knew either.

Dude didn't lose his V card for a while. It somehow became public knowledge that homie was still a virgin at work. Guys would tease him, and would talk about places in Vegas or Tijuana to lose it.

Guy always had girls at work snapping their damn necks to catch a glimpse of his ass. Totally rubbed some folks the wrong way, dude just thought he was still 'ugly' from school.

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u/acrizz Oct 06 '22

Childhood insecurities do not seem to go away unless worked through haha

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u/UntestedMethod Oct 07 '22

any tips on how do you work through something you've been conditioned to believe your entire life? like one day you just wake up and suddenly decide you're attractive now?

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u/RespecDawn Oct 06 '22

Works the same for girls.

I look back and think of the very obvious hints that a boy or occasionally, a girl, liked me and how I just didn't get it because I didn't unsweetened my own worth... Ouch.

The great dream is always to go back to that time with the self-knowledge I have now!

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u/dirkalict Oct 06 '22

Well I hope you’ve unsweetened your own worth now!

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u/RespecDawn Oct 06 '22

Jesus Christ. I should not be allowed to type on a phone.

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u/Specific-Cream-174 Oct 06 '22

Lol, nope that was awesome. 😁

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u/Flomo420 Oct 06 '22

No sugar added, all the way

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u/[deleted] Oct 06 '22

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u/uwu_SenpaiSatan Oct 07 '22

Man, we men are terrible at reading signals.

I once had this girl I really truly liked, we had been friends for years offered to be my roommate... in a 1 bedroom apartment. Wouldn't you guess it, I blew it by not recognizing what she was actually saying.

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u/IndigoGouf Oct 07 '22 edited Oct 07 '22

Yeah, I don't find any of the coy stuff appealing at all. I don't know why acting especially friendly is supposed to be an obvious indication you want to fuck. If I misjudged and made a move it would be an awkward situation for both of us. I don't care about 'the game'. I'm not upset about "missing" anything, because I never saw them as a target to begin with. Granted, I've turned down people who've asked directly too. I'm just more interested in someone I have a real friendship with first than a stranger.

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u/Darthwing Oct 06 '22

Y’all be lucky. I see things like this then I’m like “hey something like that happened to me” then I also remember that it was the girl who used me and said “you are perfect but I’m not romantically attracted to you”. Includes things like taking bra off under shirt etc so now I just wait for someone to spell it out because god forbid I misread a situation. Anyway, here’s wonderwall. (Also I still wait even if I’ve been told I’m above average on looks, again god forbid I misread something)

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u/[deleted] Oct 06 '22

[deleted]

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u/Darthwing Oct 06 '22

Clearly I can’t make a blanket statement but for this person it totally was for attention. One time I mentioned I was at a bar that weekend with the mutual friends that I am still close with and that she wasn’t (as I mentioned above) and she then brings up a guy she was talking to and wanting to go sleep with him JUST as some kind of revenge (she confirmed this straight up, because she knew I had extreme feelings for her. Literally first love of my life) for me casually mentioning I went to a bar with her former friends after I told both parties I didn’t want to be in the middle of their feud. One side kept me out of the middle (the side I’m still friends with) and the other couldn’t.

Edit: it was another comment I mentioned that there was a feud between 2 sides of the friend group. Partially because said girl was using me, the other side basically told her to stop before someone gets hurt because they actually cared about me. She didn’t stop. I was then broken for months. Anxiety attacks included.

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u/moronicuniform Oct 06 '22

Bro. Wow. How long did it take to realize?

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u/NeedToLearnToListen Oct 06 '22

A couple of years. It took me a while to understand what happened. I always thought of girls being flirty with me as them just being extra nice and friendly.

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u/moronicuniform Oct 06 '22

Aww. You didn't know you were attractive. I was the same way.

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u/Isaac331 Oct 06 '22

And now I'm fucking ugly.

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u/BurtMacklin____FBI Oct 06 '22

Well at least you realise that now. Yay!

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u/MenosElLso Oct 06 '22

Woo! Personal growth baby!

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u/No_Specialist_1877 Oct 06 '22

Reddit made me realize. I've always just thought compliments were normal.

I'm barely above average apparently that's enough.

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u/moronicuniform Oct 06 '22

Dudes don't generally get compliments from women who aren't VERY close or VERY interested. Girls get trained fairly early on by hard experience to be careful what they say to guys, to avoid unwanted advances. My wife would say she's barely above average herself, and some of her stories are just jaw-dropping.

So yeah, you're probably fairly hot my dude

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u/WinterDiscoNut Oct 06 '22

Ohhhhhh. Shit

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u/Dr_Jre Oct 06 '22

Humble too!

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u/PartyClock Oct 06 '22

User name checks out

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u/InZomnia365 Oct 06 '22

And an PSA to other people who might be reading this whos been in this phase too long: No - random cute customers/cashiers/coworkers being nice to you does not mean theyre flirting.

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u/SleazyKingLothric Oct 06 '22

They could be flirting with you though as someone currently sleeping with an unmarried coworker

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u/LookInTheDog Oct 06 '22

as someone currently sleeping with an unmarried coworker

It feels weird to add that detail in... like, if you didn't add it, I would have assumed unmarried, but as soon as you add it I'm like "but why point it out specifically, unless you or they are trying to hide something..."

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u/SleazyKingLothric Oct 06 '22

I'm in my 30's which is why I stated that. It's about 50/50 when it comes to someone being married at this age.

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u/jvfranco Oct 06 '22

Another point: you weren't thirsty. Being this cool makes them crazy

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u/jeffersonairmattress Oct 06 '22

"i always thought you were so cool- nothing phased you- you just leaned against the wall, so aloof and I wished I could have got your attention somehow.."

ALOOF?! I had crippling social anxiety and leaned against the wall to avoid fainting from the spinning fears in my head, staring into space because I was terrified I would notice somebody mocking my hideousness if I looked at them. All from my sister's cruel friend who called me an ugly potato face when I was 11.

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u/biggerwanker Oct 06 '22

I was offered a nightcap at an ex work colleagues hotel. We were about 5 minutes from my apartment. I completely missed the signals and decided to go home instead. I thought we'd be drinking more. I'm such a dumbass.

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u/Robo-boogie Oct 06 '22

That happened to me. I went over to paint her walls, did not click until a year later.

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u/angel-aura Oct 06 '22

Painted the wrong walls dude

(I hate myself for saying this)

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u/Robo-boogie Oct 06 '22

one of multiple signals missed in my younger years

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u/Slam_Burgerthroat Oct 06 '22 edited Oct 06 '22

Man this girl I was hanging out with stayed over at my place late watching a movie and having a few beers with me. It started getting late, and she literally climbed into my bed with me and stripped down to her underwear and I was like… hey, maybe this is a sign she’s into me. So I gathered up all my courage and kissed her.

She was like “whoa why did you kiss me?! I have a boyfriend!”

  1. I didn’t know she had a boyfriend
  2. What the fuck?

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u/killjoy_enigma Oct 07 '22

She knows exactly what she was doing

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u/WeeTheDuck Oct 07 '22

fucking bitch she was

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u/BurningOrangeHeaven Oct 06 '22

Her: Do you want a blowjob?

You: no thank you, I jacked off before coming over so we can really focus on this project.

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u/TheNamesMacGyver Oct 06 '22

Haha, I was like this too at that age some of them I still didn't quite get what was happening. To this day, I'll be telling a random story and my wife will be like... "So you guys went out to breakfast a couple times, then she took you to a house party with her friends, where she tried to get you drunk, invited you to spend the night at her place, and you slept on the couch?"

And I'll be like... "Yeah. I could have just driven home IDK why I did that, I wasn't drunk. I was such a dummy those days"

And my wife will be like "You know she was probably fully shaved and wearing matching underwear for that right...?" and I'm all like "OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH I THOUGHT SHE WAS JUST BEING NICE?"

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u/InZomnia365 Oct 06 '22

I had a girl say she was "fully shaved, look I even shaved my face" and had me touch her face to see how smooth it was - and I still didnt get it.

What ladies dont get is that we are trying so hard to not blow our chance by coming off creepy, that you will just actually have to take us by the hand and drag us into the bedroom...

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u/RaceHard Oct 06 '22

And even then we might think you are just Canadian. You know, nice.

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u/LongEZE Oct 07 '22

I had a girl ask me to help move some stuff around her dorm room. There was nothing to move but a box that was like 5 pounds. She was incredibly hot too. It didn’t dawn on me even when we were sitting on her bed together and was asking me about what kind of girls I’m into.

It didn’t dawn on me even when another girl asked if box girl and I were dating and I said “no”. Years later it dawned on me and I regretted it so hard

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u/Goliath_123 Oct 07 '22

Nah man feel my shaven face is straight-up code. I doubt any fella would get that one

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u/Thefar Oct 06 '22

I remember that day. I felt the disturbance in the force. As if millions of boys cried out all at once and suddenly went silent.

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u/RandomCoolName77 Oct 06 '22

do you regret that, based on what your current situation is?

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u/NeedToLearnToListen Oct 06 '22

Not really. It's mostly a funny story that I remember and laugh on how naive I was.

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u/Bismark60 Oct 06 '22

When I was in high school study hall. There was a girl that I flirted with alot and she flirted with me. One day she flat out told me she wanted me to take her flower (I was a virgin too). I gave her rides home multiple times through the high school years and she offered many times to go inside to hangout while her grandma was gone, I had to go to work after school so I never did. Looking back I know I blew it.

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u/Dorkamundo Oct 06 '22

In my high school yearbook, I have about 29 phone numbers from various girls in my class.

I thought it was just a thing that people did in yearbooks.

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u/chironomidae Oct 06 '22

Not enough attention is given to the fact that guys have comfort zones too, and that unexpected sexual situations can make us uncomfortable.

When I was in college and living in a coed dorm, a girl I hardly knew came and knocked on my door to randomly hang out with me. I liked her and I wanted to get to know her more, but man... I was playing video games. I was SO not in the headspace to be meeting a new person, I just kinda shut down completely.

I used to feel really bad thinking about it, especially since she probably had to work up courage to come approach me like that. I still think it's unfortunate, but I've also learned to give myself a little compassion and recognize that I'm not always emotionally available.

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u/calinet6 Oct 07 '22

Yeah, so true. Great mindset. If it wasn’t meant to be then it wasn’t meant to be, and we were all learning how to handle those situations at the same time. Just part of the process.

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u/Hije5 Oct 06 '22

Idk when I hear shit like this I def think it's more along the lines of "not wanting to take a chance" moresoe than "didn't pick up on signals" and this is just a way of coping.

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u/CaffeineSippingMan Oct 06 '22

If it makes you feel any better, in my early 20s the grocery store check out lady was flirting with me at the grocery store. My live in gf pointed it out. (I thought she the grocery store lady was being nice.) Fast forward a few months her and my gf are friends (not sure how that happened, maybe she got a job where my gf worked). Anyway we are at the grocery story lady's appartment and she says "shoot, i need to get to work" she goes back to her bedroom and i am still sitting in her chair watching her strip(chair faced her bedroom and it happpend so fast). I get up and my gf is just standing there looks down the Hall at her in her now in matching bra and panties. Gf asks me if we should leave. I said as smooth as fuck "we could go back there and make her late for work" my gf hesitated, then said we should leave.

We left.

I married the gf. Today it seems like something I saw on TV. I asked my wife about it the other day, she remembered the color of the bra and panties and that they were her favorite color.

We chickened out.

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u/calinet6 Oct 07 '22

Wild story. Is it just like a weird event as she was getting ready or do you think there was a genuine shot?

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u/Portablemammal1199 Oct 06 '22

Just fucking tell us guys you dtf. Like holy shit. We get called out on creeps for picking up on the wrong message and we get shit on for not picking up hints. It sucks either way.

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u/RetardedRedditRetort Oct 06 '22

That's not so bad, you didn't even realize it.

In my case, a hot 27 year old invited me to her hotel room and I chickened out, I was 18 at the time. She took my friend to her hotel room that night.

I think I was concerned about STD's or something along those lines... stupid. And the age difference sort of weirded me out.

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u/leprasson12 Oct 06 '22 Helpful (Pro)

It feels less crappy now to see this many people went through it too lol.

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u/Enk1ndle Oct 06 '22 Helpful

Alternatively, low self esteem.

There's no way she could be flirting with me. Maybe she's making fun of me?

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u/AnotherOfTheseUsers Oct 06 '22

I believed this. Especially because in middle school two girls pranked me saying that one of them liked me and then laughed at my face for really believing it.

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u/GreenGlassDrgn Oct 06 '22

Twenty years ago a random hot person stopped me on the parking lot and asked me for my phone number. Literally the only time thats ever happened in my entire life, and I am still sure they either a) lost a bet or b) were making themselves feel like a better person by asking a fugly, visibly depressed and overweight person for their number, believing that they've somehow made my day by letting me bask in the warmth of their superficial attentions.

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u/SFW_HARD_AT_WORK Oct 06 '22

Or just weird social dynamics. I feel some girls do this for attention or something. I've had a situation like this when a girl walked up and started twirking super hard an inch away from me, so of course, I tapped her shoulder to try to talk to her and got this super aggressive "don't touch me", mind you she walked up to where I was and started twirking an inch away from me. She did it again, and when I stayed again she rushed off and got her boyfriend. Dude didn't want to fight or anything but these other random guys who saw the whole thing stepped in and calmed the situation and told the guy his gf was on some bullshit. Similarly in more recent times at vars I'll just be chilling and all these girls will walk past and do subtle things like make eye contact ir bend over, try to make conversation with people around you, etc but they all have husbands/boyfriends and they get super passive aggressive when you don't chase after them, but it's like for what, you're taken. Only thing I can think of is some women liking the attention from flirting or something

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u/Togodooders Oct 06 '22

I can relate, I was walking back to my buddy in a nightclub after going to the toilets and this girl who was walking in front of me just turned around and started kissing me then she walked away again. I’d seen her in the club before and always thought she was good looking but instead of following her and buying her a drink I just went back to where my friend was and carried on the night. Wtf was I thinking? How obvious did she have to make it? I still think about it from time to time twenty years later.

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u/YpsitheFlintsider Oct 06 '22

There are some problems here. But what did you think the kissing was about? Lol

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u/StopReadingMyUser Oct 06 '22

Is she into you?

"....you know, it's hard to tell in situations like these because she could just be more friendly than other ppl or maybe her culture does that sort of thing as a passing gesture. It's always possible she greets everyone this way or at worst she assumed you were her boyfriend then left after realizing her mistake; so best not to think much of it"

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u/RaceHard Oct 06 '22

Yeah no, you are right, that sounds reasonable.

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u/regnad__kcin Oct 06 '22

See back then I mostly knew if a girl was flirting my problem was just not knowing what the fuck to do next. Like, poor girl would be basically coming on to a quadriplegic.

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u/TopOfTheMorning2Ya Oct 06 '22 edited Oct 07 '22

Same but probably would still have no idea what to do in this situation.

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u/bsylent Oct 06 '22

Same. I cannot begin to count the times friends, and even strangers, would later point out that a girl had been hitting on me hard, and I had been oblivious. Even my future wife said she had thrown herself at me 10 years before we ended up dating, during the last time we had lived in the same city, and I had not responded. What a jerk lol

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u/FlowSoSlow Oct 06 '22

Bro same. I'd be at concerts and girls would start backing up into me and I'd be like "Stop crowding me I'm trying to enjoy the show."

In my defense I like music far more than girls.

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u/GavrielBA Oct 06 '22

Music never tells you "no" and will never actively try to hurt you.

I feel you!

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u/[deleted] Oct 06 '22

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u/flashmedallion Oct 06 '22

I used to make jokes about it just to watch my friends visibly die.

"Man when I was up in the crowd this girl in front of me kept reaching back and grabbing my phone in my pocket. I think she was trying to steal it, I got the fuck outta there"

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u/theRed-Herring Oct 06 '22

I was just at a concert with my wife... These women were having a blast on their own for most of the show. It wasn't until the last set that they started dancing differently and seemingly trying to get my attention. One even came up into our row next to me. It abruptly ended when the woman in front of my wife bent over and stuck her ass into our row. If my wife was sitting it literally would have been in front of her face. She turned around and my wife was literally loling at her. They were out of there before the song finished.

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u/frzaa Oct 06 '22

Did you find the answer?

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u/rubixd Oct 06 '22

Well I got married but yes my older more confident self would throw caution to the wind and jump in there.

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u/jejcicodjntbyifid3 Oct 06 '22

Knowing what you know now, what would you do in that situation?

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u/GavrielBA Oct 06 '22

Do the same move to her back!

Even if she walks away it'd be still funny

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u/rubixd Oct 06 '22

Idk exactly but I’d start with a HUGE smile. Maybe slowly walk forward with a stupid little dance. Maybe mime pulling her towards me with an invisible rope.

Basically you have to be ok with looking like a dumbass and getting rejected, laugh at yourself and move on — but most importantly you have to have fun with it.

14

u/CardinalnGold Oct 06 '22

You had me up until the invisible rope part lol

14

u/superfuntimesn7 Oct 06 '22

Weird that's where he got me.

Cuz like that's how ropes work and stuff

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u/Harold-The-Barrel Oct 06 '22

“do you like beyblades?”

4

u/mojobytes Oct 06 '22

Yeah, except she would be messing with me.

7

u/Last_Gigolo Oct 06 '22

What he did is just right.

She doesn't want him, she is just checking to see if she can get his attention. Nothing more.

6

u/lionseatcake Oct 06 '22

Just ignore her because she obviously needs a lot of attention.

5

u/DC_Disrspct_Popeyes Oct 06 '22

Easy, throw her a nod and a thumbs up.

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u/invincitank Oct 06 '22 Beating Heart Yas Queen

bend and snap

176

u/Dudebeard86 Oct 06 '22

OMG the bend and snap! Works every time!

70

u/putaaaan Oct 06 '22

Makes me want a hot dog real bad

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u/Chode_of_Justice Oct 06 '22

He’s got a package for you…

18

u/teetaps Oct 06 '22

You gotta tear the fascial tissue

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690

u/HoomanOnFire Oct 06 '22

What is going on here

610

u/theels6 Oct 06 '22

Mating ritual

47

u/Raid-Z3r0 Oct 06 '22

A failed one to practical effect

208

u/KindaAnAss Oct 06 '22

I think I figured it out. He's trying to sneak something to the dude in the red shirt then realizes the girl is recording something right infront of him and other people are recording him and he panics while trying to palm whatever he had

129

u/CupboardOfPandas Oct 06 '22

Huh, now that you say it I see it as well.

Also, this filming people minding their own business is getting annoying.

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u/coltstrgj Oct 06 '22

I think he was motioning to her phone on the ground.

18

u/Orleanian Oct 06 '22

I think it's the 1987 World Champion Swedish Mens Ice Hockey Team. You can tell because it was their fourth title and he's holding them with 4 fingers.

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u/CheesusChrisp Oct 06 '22

Thanks detective, you revealed what seemed like a sad situation to be a fucking hilarious one. It’s crazy that this moment was caught on camera

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2.2k

u/MisterWhiffle Oct 06 '22

Pretty sure she was dancing over her phone (which was on the ground and recording), and he was wondering why it was on the ground... Then he had the realization.

572

u/bumjiggy Oct 06 '22

"that can't be very sanitary"

13

u/Yanky_Doodle_Dickwad Oct 06 '22

WB is all wrong

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u/Cory-FocusST Oct 06 '22

It's on the lock screen when she picks it up.

131

u/MisterWhiffle Oct 06 '22

Enhance.

48

u/Benol2018 Oct 06 '22

ZOOM, ENHANCE MORE

70

u/Lucky_Number_3 Oct 06 '22 Gold

36

u/BustinArant Oct 06 '22

Are you NASSA

16

u/dingman58 Oct 06 '22

She's definitely pushing the limits of that space suit

4

u/BustinArant Oct 06 '22

I was going to stay on the fence about the whole morally questionable zooming thing.

..but yeah you should be careful with the dark side of the moon.

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u/GalacticCmdr Oct 06 '22

Uncrop

24

u/rabbidwombats Oct 06 '22

Sorry, that only works on pictures and not her top

41

u/delvach Oct 06 '22

She trained facial recognition to unlock it from that angle, she's just checking her messages.

10

u/chironomidae Oct 06 '22

booty recognition

23

u/DylanSpaceBean Oct 06 '22

Probably hit the lock button to end the recording. That stops it and locks the device

34

u/[deleted] Oct 06 '22

[deleted]

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u/[deleted] Oct 06 '22

[deleted]

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138

u/plantsb4putas Oct 06 '22

Girl got the rhythm of a 2x4 in a hurricane

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u/_IsFuckingInHeaven Oct 06 '22

This girl who I was close with in college invited me to visit her halfway across the country in Houston. I never got vibes she was too into me while I was there, then I reflect back and she literally tries to show me a new bra after a night out, changes in front of me and I turned around because I thought I was being noble or some shit because of ‘platonic’ friends. It would have most likely been a dodged bullet given how things unfolded over the years however it sticks out like a sore thumb to me and god dammit I wanted to see those titties

13

u/thatWas-unexpected Oct 07 '22

We never say no to titties

33

u/stratj45d28 Oct 06 '22

Soooooo glad there wasn’t video proof of my life before cellphone’s.

132

u/guyhabit Oct 06 '22

Is that guy on drugs?

59

u/DerJogge Oct 06 '22

Yes, he’s getting that nature high

26

u/andersonb47 Oct 06 '22

In the sense that Molly is derived from ingredients which exist on earth and are therefore natural, yes.

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u/[deleted] Oct 06 '22

My god man, introduce yourself

181

u/Snickidy Oct 06 '22

He's drunk to the point where he's gonna think about this in 5 minutes and run to find her

25

u/justice5150 Oct 06 '22

Best response on this post haha.

This reply to you is a bootleg award since reddit won't give me anymore free ones.

11

u/YpsitheFlintsider Oct 06 '22

This may not even have anything to do with him lol. College partiers are weird like this walking every which way and generally not having spatial awareness.

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u/lovecamp Oct 06 '22

Drop it like it's warm

27

u/NicetomeetyouIMVEGAN Oct 06 '22

Put it back on the table like it's not cooled down enough

10

u/Roheez Oct 06 '22

Blow on it and shift your grip

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21

u/oO_RickJamez_Oo Oct 06 '22

Did she just stole a phone?

114

u/bebesilvia Oct 06 '22

Girls that go to Yates do this. Anyone in the UK will get it.

94

u/Jonnymurphy Oct 06 '22

Girls don’t look like that in Yates tho

22

u/bebesilvia Oct 06 '22

Oh god no 🤣

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u/ReeceReddit1234 Oct 06 '22

I'm in the UK and I don't get it. Welp, time to become a citizen of anywhere else

19

u/Elastichedgehog Oct 06 '22

It's like an even more degenerate spoons

7

u/bebesilvia Oct 06 '22

I couldn’t have described it any better 😂

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u/KamikazeKitten916 Oct 06 '22

Did she.. just pick up a random phone off the ground?

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u/Novel-Engineering590 Oct 06 '22

I look at her, then I look at him and all I am thinking is... he's going to wake up in a bathtub of ice missing a kidney. It's a trap.

35

u/R011_5af3_yeah Oct 06 '22

some girls just dont understand the power they weild

33

u/rjnd2828 Oct 06 '22

I think she understands fully

5

u/Killertorts Oct 06 '22

Dude is clearly high as a kite…

7

u/SelamatkanKami Oct 06 '22

“The female performs her ritual mating dance” (In David Attenborough’s voice)

31

u/Flygrumbz00 Oct 06 '22

Bro, I’m just realizing this has happened to me, I’m never getting a gf.

20

u/SFW_HARD_AT_WORK Oct 06 '22

She's probably not flirting with that dude at all tho

5

u/ThePleasantArea Oct 06 '22

When I was 22 I moved to another town and me and a few of my friends got together the night before I left to go to a strip club. As I’m sitting there uncomfortably watching the dancers, a girl (not a dancer) just walks right up to me grabs me by the face and starts making out with me. Needless to say I was surprised and my friends were all hooting it up. But, I just smiled and went back to my seat and continued to uncomfortably watch the dancers until we left.

5

u/flowery0 Oct 06 '22

Wtf happened?

6

u/_meuovo Oct 06 '22

He has a Ron Weasley face

5

u/Lightning_fanguy Oct 06 '22

...... and that kids is how I met your mother.

11

u/_mattyjoe Oct 06 '22

I’m pretty sure he’s tripping balls, and I’m pretty sure he thinks she just emerged out of the floor.

17

u/TitoEspacio Oct 06 '22

I wonder, is there a subreddit for clips like this in which people do stupid stuff at parties?

30

u/iwantrootbark Oct 06 '22

I'm in this gif and I don't like it

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u/Player_Ny Oct 06 '22

"how to steal a phone in a party whem someone is looking at you"

4

u/AccomplishedAd6025 Oct 06 '22

Reminds me of this colorful spiders that dance for the female spiders to get them to want to mate.

4

u/Myantology Oct 06 '22

Ah subtlety.

4

u/BauerHouse Oct 06 '22

And David Attenborough’s voice: “Here’s the young attractive female, as a space naturally clears around her. She has spotted her mate, and now she will make contact the best way she knows how. A flourishing dance in skimpy clothing, capitalizing on her future mate’s inability to practice restraint in the moment. He’s confused at first, struck dumb by the display, and for the remainder of the evening she remains elusive engaging with other possible mates, keeping her main objective at arm’s length. It’s a little cruel, but she’ll get her way in the end by building up the insatiable desire to be with her, using jealousy as her main weapon”

5

u/Lastof1 Oct 06 '22

I remember a girl in my class in high school invited me to a birthday party at her house, we never really spoke before that so I didn't really know anything about her apart from her name, anyway, I forgot all about it and we never spoke again, I kept thinking how weird it was and after asking a few people who I assumed had been invited in the class and they never knew anything about the party.

5

u/pablothecreator1 Oct 06 '22

Dude said “zoinks!” 😂😂😂